Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
