yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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