your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
