it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
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