Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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