it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
