I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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