Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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