whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize
