covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize