my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
