That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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