Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
