drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
