I got chris browned last night
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
