why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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