somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize