I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Randomize
