apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
