his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
