Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize