I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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