I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
