just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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