you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
