I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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