He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
