Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize