im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
