fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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