So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize
