Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
