And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize