thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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