Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
