I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
