i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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