Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
