Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
