last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
