he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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