Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Randomize
