Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize