Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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