we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
