Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
