My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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