So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
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