Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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