You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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