I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize